redders: (iorek!)
Well, the learning curve with the MacBook is going nicely. Only once have I hit buttons randomly, nearly breaking Google Wave in a vague attempt to understand a computer, and while I'm still quietly like "why is the function key where the ctrl key should be and why isn't the control key the ctrl key and omg I need to program a right-click area because holding control and clicking is SO HARD and why is command and ctrl different and I should have kept using my IIgs because I would be better at this now" I think I've largely got things down.

I've yet to transfer a great amount of files, but as I'm keeping the ten-year-old Vaio anyhow I don't see where there's a grand rush. I'd backed up most things (writing-wise) some months ago, and try to keep current copies of most my stuff on my various USB sticks and online... and other than my job search stuff, that's all that's even vaguely important.

Parents were up over the last two days. I was so proud of myself for correcting their misgendering all of once, but then the minute we got to Costco it was like "Eeeeeeee let's misgender our child in front of anyone we can find weeeeeeeeeee!" I never quite know what to say. I feel guilty correcting them, feel like I'm blowing out my adrenals standing by them. Go parents, but at least I got around $200 in groceries as a Christmas present. I like food! It's almost worth exploding my stress response!

Oddly enough, I'm off for a business trip at the end of the month. It's not a nursing thing, so yawn.

How is everyone else faring? I haven't even found any terrifying links for y'all lately, it's just been OMG I CAN LISTEN TO RADIO... ON INTERNET??? all week.

Daaang

Mar. 25th, 2010 03:15 pm
redders: (ekichi - bleaah)
Man, one thing about being cleared to self-inject: the phone call from the pharmacy saying "hi, we have to special order this!" and "oh sorry, your insurance doesn't cover this at all!" At least it'll be in tomorrow for my next dose, and at least I've been budgeting figuring on non-coverage (and at least testosterone is relatively cheap... unless I misheard $105 and it's really $1050? Nooo...) but still. Now I'm nervous about non-coverage on all those office visits! Come on insurance, continue to not-bill me!

Also, still totally not on the ball with telling my mom I'm on this stuff. She knows I'm trans, but I know it'll be a whole new freakout for her, knowing I'm actually doing something about it? I realize it's kind of my life and all, but it's hard not to constantly update the mom. And I've still not totally come out at school, though a lot of folks know... Telling people is just a hassle, I don't know. I'm just not really down with folks paying attention to me, unless it's to how exceedingly brilliant I am, and to a large extent I'm still occasionally saying to myself, "is this really worth it?" I'm cool with it taking all my money, I'm cool with strangers being weirded out by me, I'm cool with having to jam a needle in my leg on a weekly basis. But thinking about talking to my family... I don't know. I have such conflict-avoidance issues that I'm always half-willing to live an intolerable life as someone I'm not, at least until all my family dies and I can't worry them with my petty issues any longer. Ugh, go self-doubt and fear of conflict! They are like my superpowers I tell you.

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